INFATUATION & LOVE.
An intense but short-lived passion or administration for someone or something over a predefine period of time.
Infatuation does not always turn into love, sometimes it stays that way until the relationship comes to a close, either because the object of infatuation fails to live up to the fantasy or because they don’t reciprocate the feelings to each other.
That said, infatuation can turn into love sometimes.
Experts say prolonged infatuation eventually turns into limerance, an involuntary obsession with a partner that is usually marked by excessive thoughts, feelings, and a desire to have your those feelings reciprocated to the partner.
Don’t freak out just yet! A healthy dose of infatuation is a normal start to any relationship/courtship.
Symptoms of Infatuation.
(1) You See and Expect Perfection.
(2) Infatuation leads you to believe you have found the “perfect” person as well as the “perfect” relationship. …
(2) You Have Persistent and Intrusive Thoughts. …
(3) You Drop Everything for Them. …
(4) You Become Jealous and Possessive. …
(5) You Feel Tired and Lonely.
A Strong affection, A profound and caring affection towards someone.
Also: Affectionate, benevolent concern or care for other people or beings, and for their well-being.
More so; it’s a feeling of intense attraction towards someone.
A deep or abiding liking for something; an enthusiasm for something.
However; it is also the act of a person who is the object of romantic feelings.
A term of friendly address, regardless of feelings.
A thing, activity etc which is the object of one’s deep liking or enthusiasm.
There is a very big difference between infatuation and being in love.
Infatuation is when you first see someone or your first sight to someone that you are attracted and connected to emotionally and immediately you feel there is a connection or bond between, whereas; love is knowing the good side and bad side of someone and still loving them all the same at all cost.
Infatuation is a Fast Fantasy.
Being infatuated with someone requires no thinking or second thought. You do not know anything about the person that you are attracted to or better still,the person may be a total stranger to you.
This is a very quick attraction that feels like it hits you over the head and touches your heart. As soon as you see this person, you are already fantasizing about your future together without knowing anything about them. You already believe that things are going to work out for the both of you based on appearances only. Infatuation is automatically filling in the blanks for that person and hoping that things will work out the way you want and as you wish for.
Love is a Reality That Takes A Very Long Time To Reciprocate.
Being infatuated is an instant crush on someone that you see for the first time (Love at first sight).
Love, on the other hand, can take more time to get to that stage of falling for each other back. To love and be loved. Everyone is different in how long it takes to falls in love. Love requires meeting someone for the first time and not knowing what to expect. It may take a few dates, walks, memories, spending time together, chilling and catching fun to realize that you are in love. Love is seeing into the person’s humanity like where their strengths and weaknesses falls. You love them on a good day and you like them on a bad day.
Infatuation is Expecting Perfection from someone
When you first look at your love interest, you already believe they are perfect without knowing anything about them. You think that because they look attractive, and their face is calm, that it means their personality will be the same way if their look. In our minds, they must always look beautiful, handsome, be strong, financially capable, agreeable, courageous, and exhibit no blemishes.
In reality, people have a lot of sides and you cannot choose which ones you would prefer to make an appearance. If we see any imperfections in our partner, it will destroy the illusion we placed on our partners that made us happy. The reality of a true partner is seeing all of their imperfections and wrongs, yet you still keep on loving them anyway.
Love is Being Real.
Love is all about being comfortable in revealing your true self. We feel comfortable in exposing memories that may be embarrassing or hard to talk about it to someone else that isn’t special to you. We also reveal our true selves in the way we look. Our partner has seen how we look without makeup or with our bed hair when we wake up.
It is the same thing as we get older to old age, as we are not going to look the same as when we met our significant other. We will either lose our hair for baldness or it will go grey, we will gain weight, get wrinkles, loose joints, etc. If someone really loved you and care for you, they wouldn’t bother on how you look because they love and care for you too much . You will always be beautiful to that person, and you will always look younger on that person’s face.
Infatuation Makes Us Want Self Perfection.
While infatuation makes us only see the good deeds in our partner, it also means giving our partner’s a perfect image/reputation of ourselves. We want the illusion that we created to stick so hard. This can mean only telling our partners the good thing about our day or going to extremes to look perfect all the time like wearing too much makeup to hide blemishes or even plastic surgery to cover a scar.
We are giving our partners a superficial self in fear that they will leave us and our illusion will be shattered. The love you two have for each other will mean more than any flaws you exhibit. Love means that your partner knows that you are not perfect and still accept you with that.
Love is Timeless
Love means that what you feel for each other will never go away no matter where you are. Your partner may have to go on a business trip that can take months, but breaking up is not an option for you guys. Love does not have an expiration date in that you both want forever with each other. Infatuation, on the other hand, is just a fleeting moment. You may feel intensely about that person, but you cannot imagine being with that person for the rest of your life at all.
This is the biggest and most confusing part!
Infatuation is Obsession, Love isn’t
People who are infatuated may think that they are in love with their love interest because of how much they care for them. You may feel like you need to call that person to check up on them or even follow them to know their well being. They could be out with their friends/family/ co workers in an Organization/ peer group in school, but you make your partner feel guilty for not being with you all day long
This can be very tiring for you to be on constant alert with your partner and not trusting them at all. This type of “love” is really an obsession. Love means being willing to let that person go to have time alone and be alone. Love also means that you are calmer and can feel the love you have for that person uplift you since you feel secure in your relationship/courtship. Being in love is having the confidence to know that the person you see when you wake up in the morning is the one that you want to be with you for the rest of your life.
All I can’t live without you, if you leave me; I’ll die… it’s all infatuation.
TIPS ON HOW TO FIND TRUE
(1) Find God first.
“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things” (Colossians 3:2).
Before getting all geared up in finding your earthly love—find your heavenly love first! God loved you so much than that He sacrificed His one and only Son so that every single person on the earth can have eternal life. When you have found God, you will find in Him everything you need for the rest of your life—marriage, children, work, empty nest, retirement…etc.
(2) Be faithful to your first love.
Hint: see Tip 1
“Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first” (Revelation 2:4).
There’s a great temptation that once you’ve opened up to finding a true love—that you will forget your first love in Christ. This happens because we are human and fallible to our faults of wanting our emotional and physical needs met first. However, the Lord is on your side and if you would place your complete trust in Him demonstrated by your faithfulness, He will meet all your needs and wants.
Finding the love of your life is like pursuing your goal or finding other things—you should be open to it. Reluctantly getting involved with someone may be a sign that God isn’t calling you into a relationship right now and He will later when the time comes. However, if you find the longing in your heart, be open to the preparation that God will lead you to the right person. Stay true to your first love and He will guide you in the right direction more than you think or expected.
Cause The Lord only know the best and suitable things for you.
What are the effects of infatuation?
According to the Harvard Department of Neurobiology infatuation symptoms can include insomnia, cravings, and loss of appetite. Other symptoms include forgetfulness, exhaustion, or even stomach issues.
So, here are a few ways to practice Opposite Action in order to change your feeling of infatuation:
Avoid everything that reminds you of the object of your infatuation.
Make a list of reasons why the infatuation is harmful to you.
Join support groups.
Move onto someone else.